Shy Mouse

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Shy around women in general, Farfour was particularly embarrassed to be talking to these beautiful young cheerleaders from Ohio so soon after “the scandal.” These happy, healthy young women had all seen a very stoned mouse emerging from Saddam’s anal cavity on CNN and the other networks – played over and over and over on a loop – just a few months earlier. How could he ever overcome such a humiliating (and genre-limiting) international media debut? Was he destined to be a shy boy forever?

The cheerleaders were all a lot taller than he was and most of them were blond and pretentious. Farfour figured that their height and pigmentation difference might explain the girls’ lack of empathy for his situation. Two of the gals removed their iPods and pretended to be interested in what he was saying.

“I never said for anyone to kill Israelis in the show, I said that the soldiers were hurting everyone in my city. Those weren’t my words that they translated. It was the words of a well-meaning but nationalistic Israeli translator at MEMRI. He misrepresented my texts.

Misrepresentation in a media product translation is worse than lying. It’s a form of structural lying that stuffs lies into someone else’s mouth. It’s like writing History in a skewed way that suits your own agenda. It’s creates false discourse and this makes everyone a bit dumber. If only we could…” Farfour started but then caught a reflection of the gum-balloon that the smart one was blowing with her huge, inflamed wet lips.

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“This is the best remix of Bootylicious ever!” shouted Candy Amsterdam, as seriously as she could while dressed in her 50s rollerskate fashions. The strawberry scoop of her two-scoop sugar-cone bobbed up and down between her words.

Farfour felt the familiar tingling of hopelessness and defeat, like he’d been beaten down by his own lack of confidence. The text had enslaved him yet again.

But how much longer could it keep him down…


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